Motivation.

Motivation is the driving force behind human actions. It is the process that initiates, guides and maintains goal-oriented behaviors. There are two main types of motivation: extrinsic and intrinsic. Extrinsic motivation arises from outside of the individual and often involves external rewards such as trophies, money, social recognition, or praise. Intrinsic motivation is internal and arises from within the individual, such as doing a complicated crossword puzzle purely for the gratification of solving a problem. 

It's normal and natural to see people in pairs, trios, and others in small groups. A desire to be with others is an affiliate motive. The desire for affiliation with others is linked with finding support and motivation, it has been described as a fundamental part of human nature. We appreciate and care about being helpful to others. We take and use our time and our efforts for others but we forget about ourselves sometimes. On the other hand, self-compassion motivates us to relate healthier with ourselves. In addition, emotional intelligence, and wisdom are linked with self-compassion.

Reasons for wanting to affiliate with others:

• We need to achieve certain goals.

• Learning and gaining knowledge.

• Need to reduce anxiety and fear or avoid people who are likely to cause or increase fear and anxiety.

• Need to seek others' emotional support and comfort.

We think, love, trust, give, and listen. These are powerful behavioral elements when it comes to caring emotional strength and happiness in life(compassion).

Compassion. Sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings of others.

We need to care for others in need, to be compassionate.

Self-compassion. Sympathetic pity and concern for self-suffering.

We need to care for ourselves to be self-compassionate.

Self-compassion is associated with emotional maturity and entails fostering nonjudgmental, forgiving, loving acceptance of oneself as well as others. 

When caring for others care about yourself too.

1. Think of others but don't forget to think about yourself too. Because caring for others depends on your Strength.

2. Give, don't allow yourself to be used.

                       

3. Love, don't allow your heart to be abused.

4. Trust, don't be naive.

5. Listen, don't lose your voice. Give a good piece of yourself to yourself sometimes.

Remember, With self-compassion, we give ourselves the same kindness and care, we'd give to a good friend. Motivation is a subjective experience, and what works for one person may not work for another. However, by understanding the different types of motivation and experimenting with different strategies, you can find what works best for you.

Further reading:

The Need to Belong: Desire for Interpersonal Attachments as a Fundamental Human Motivation

Dennis M. McInerney (2019) Motivation, Educational Psychology, 39:4, 427-429, https://doi.org/10.1080/01443410.2019.1600774

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